The Dorothy Show
by Mia Yagyu
Summary: This was one of my first fics, but I got really bored. I got the idea from the VW Jetta commercials that aired a loooong time ago like last year


The Dorothy Show!  
Disclaimer:   
Mia (aka Dorothy): Hey, wuz up me peeps? It's me again and Quatre's here.  
Quatre: (waves to the audience) Hi!  
Mia: I had another bright idea for a good fanfic, although it's kinda short! I got this psycho idea from the VW Jetta commercials.  
Quatre: Mia's told me all about it and it sounds like something she would write.  
Mia: (Growing angry) What's that supposed to mean?!  
Quatre: Never mind. But you don't own Gundam or the VW Jetta commercials, do you?  
Mia: No, but I do wanna own Gundam and a VW Bettle, that's yellow…. (trails off)  
Quatre: (sighs) Well, there goes some of my money down the drain.  
Mia: Aww, Quatre, you're so sweet.  
Quatre: Maybe too sweet.  
Mia: Is there such thing as being too sweet? Never mind, don't answer that. Anywayz, as I alwayz say, ENJOY! See ya!  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
"Alright, are you peeps ready for the show?" Sally's voice rang out.  
"Yeah!" The crowd cheered   
"Okay, here's your host, Dorothy Catalonia!" Sally shouted into her microphone. Dorothy walked out.  
"Hello, and welcome to my show, The Dorothy Show!" Dorothy exclaimed as she pushed the curtains out of her way.  
"What's on today's show, Dorothy?" The crowd exclaimed in unison.  
"Well, today we have the Gundam boys. They are Heero Yuy, the so-called perfect soldier, Duo Maxwell, the braided Shinigami, Trowa Barton, the Crying Clown, Quatre Raberba Winner, the hottest, in my opinion, and Chang WuFei, the Justice Boy!" Dorothy insulted.  
"Cool!" The audience shouted.  
The boys came out on stage. Then Hilde came out on stage and whispered something in Dorothy's ear.  
"What?! Tell Ms. Relena I'll interview her later." Dorothy simply stated.  
"No, she hates being separated from Heero." Hilde pointed out.  
"Sheesh! Get security on her."  
"HHHHHEEEEEEEEEERRRRROOOOO!!!" Relena shouted from backstage.  
"Can't you gag her or something?" Dorothy muttered underneath her breath.  
"Hmm.. Never thought of that! Duh, I'm supposed to be a mechanical Genius!" Hilde hit her head in despite of her ditziness.  
"Oui!" Dorothy sighed and turned to face the boys.  
"Can we get on with this, unna?" WuFei asked.  
"My name's Dorothy." Dorothy shot one of her evil looks towards the Chinese Gundam pilot. She walked over to her purple chair and sat down.  
"What's this all about anyway?" Duo asked.  
"You'll see. I'm gonna ask you guys a few questions. Okay, say it's the night before your wedding night and you realize you need a haircut. Do you go with the cheap haircutters, who really don't do a good job, or for a small bit more, a good hairstylist that knows what they are doing?" Dorothy asked as she grabbed her tablet to record the answers.  
"I'd cut it myself." Heero simply put it.  
"I have never cut my hair. So why should I start now?" Duo asked. Dorothy just sighed.  
"…….." Trowa muttered.  
"I guess the highly recommend hairstylist." Quatre smiled. Dorothy's heart melted.  
"Why should I tell you, unna?" WuFei muttered.  
"I'll call you Justice Freak." Dorothy threatened.  
"Fine, the cheap people. I really don't care." WuFei sighed.  
"HHHHEEEEEEEERRRROOOO!!!" Relena yelled once again. Dorothy grew more angry.  
"Okay, that was interesting. Now say your girlfriend fell into the Grand Canyon and was hanging on by a branch. Would you go with a sufer boy whose always wanted to do a stunt like this, or a professional who has saved many lives?" Dorothy fired another question.  
"I'd do it myself." Heero said without changing his expression.  
"Am I the Sufer-dude?" Duo asked. Dorothy once again sighed.  
"………." Trowa muttered something that no one could hear.  
"Hmm…The experienced one, because I don't wanna lose the woman of my life to some sufer-dude's stupidity." Quatre smiled.  
"Hey, are you saying I'm clumsy, Quatre?" Duo had a threating tone.  
"No, I wasn't! Honest!" Quatre defended himself.  
"Uh-huh. Sure. And all this time I thought you were a kind hearted person." Duo sat down and crossed his arms.  
"But I am!" Quatre looked as if he were gonna cry.  
"Enough you two!" Dorothy separated the two gundam boys.  
"Fine." Duo pouted.  
"WuFei, what would you do?" Dorothy said through gritted teeth.  
"I'm not telling you." WuFei snobbed the question.  
"Justice Freak, Justice Freak, Justice Freak!" Dorothy taunted.  
"Fine, the sufer-dude." WuFei sighed.  
"I didn't think you trusted me?" Duo came out of his pouting stage.  
"I don't Maxwell." WuFei simply said.  
"Then why would you want to me to save Sally?" Duo asked, with an evil smile on his face. Sally blushed.  
"I don't like that weak unna." WuFei blushed but only for a split-second.  
"Uh-huh." Dorothy said evilly.  
"Whatever." WuFei sighed.  
"HHHHEEEEEEEERRRROOOO!!!!" Relena shouted from backstage.  
"Grrr!" Dorothy muttered as she walked backstage.   
Relena was being held by two of the security guards, who just stood there. Dorothy came over to her and slapped her.  
"Hey, why did you do that?!" Relena whimpered.  
"You're ruining my show!" Dorothy screamed.  
"Well, I never…." Relena said as she walked out.  
"Guards, take her away." Dorothy snapped her fingers  
"Hey! You can't do this! I'm the queen of the world." Relena shouted.  
"Whatever, I just did! And you WERE the queen of the world." Dorothy contradicted.  
"Hey! Get off of me!" Relena shouted as the two guards pulled her away.  
"Well, that's over with, now back to my show!" Dorothy sighed and walked out.  
"What took you so long?" Duo asked as he switched positions on the not-so-comfortable chairs.  
"I had a little business to take care of." Dorothy smirked, knowing what she had done was evil, but who really cared, besides Relena.  
"Do you have any more questions to ask?" Heero asked.  
"Uh…. Yes, but only one more." Dorothy smiled.  
"Okay, shoot!" Duo exclaimed.  
"Omae o Korosu." Heero pointed his gun at Duo.  
"No, no, no! Not the gun, Dorothy's question." Duo defended himself.  
"Oh, then why didn't you say that?" Heero said as he sat down.  
"Now we'll have to take the gun away from you, Heero. This is a family show, and little children don't need to see those yet." Dorothy nodded.  
"If this is a family show, then why is Maxwell here?" WuFei pointed out.  
"Hey!" Duo defended himself.  
"Okay, on with my next question." Dorothy continued, "If your girlfriend were to have brain surgery, would you have a Surgeon who just came outta school, or a professional surgeon to operate on her?"   
"I do it myself." Heero sighed  
"Hmm… that's a tough one, but I'd have to go with the first guy. Wait a sec, are these trick questions?" Duo asked. Dorothy sighed once again at the Gboy's stupid questions.  
"………." No one could hear what Trowa said, but Dorothy just sighed.  
"The professional, because I want my girlfriend to live a happy life." Quatre stated as he looked Dorothy in the eyes. Dorothy was caught in a trance, until Duo yelled.  
"Huh? What's wrong?" Dorothy broke her trance.  
"It's Relena, and she's raging mad. We're all doomed!" Duo covered his face and ran backstage.  
"Dorothy, Dorothy, Dorothy. See now that you had me thrown out, I've gone crazy. And you don't wanna see me go crazy." Relena had an evil smile on her face like Dorothy would have most of the time.  
"Now, Relena, you're the pacifist princess. Since people are watching this show, you just might lose your reputation." Quatre warned.  
"Oh! I forgot that!" Relena suddenly cheered up and turned to the audience.  
"Yep, she's a weak unna, too." WuFei simply shook his head in dismay.  
"I'm sorry for my behavior, and hope that you can still want me to be the pacifist princess." Relena apologized.  
"…Maybe." Trowa spoke.  
"Oh, my God! Did I just hear Trowa say something?" Dorothy exclaimed in awe.  
"I can't believe it either." Quatre said in a surprising tone.  
"Okay, Relena, let WuFei answer this one question, and then you can apologize all you what," Then Dorothy added under her breath, "After the shows over and everyone leaves."  
"Okay, I'll go backstage and see if I can get Duo back out here." Relena smiled as she headed backstage. But as soon as she came back there, Duo came running out on stage in panic that she was gonna kill him.  
"It's okay, Duo. She's backstage now." Dorothy comforted, with an evil twinkle in her eye. She knew that the guards would see Relena and throw her out from backstage, again.  
"10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1.…" Dorothy counted down.  
"Aahhhhh! Heero, help me, these guards are attacking me again!" Relena exclaimed from backstage.  
"Right on time, Ms. Relena." Dorothy smiled her evil smile.  
"Wanna know my answer, unna? Or are you just gonna keep tormenting me, by tormenting Relena?" WuFei coldly asked.  
"Oh, okay, what's your answer?" Dorothy asked in surprise that WuFei actually volunteered his answer.  
"The cheap surgeon, because I really don't have a girlfriend." WuFei said with a straight face.  
"What about me, Justice Boy?" Sally asked from her microphone.  
"Who, you? Who cares?" WuFei spoke with such coldness.  
"I know what you did last night, so you better say you love me, or prepare to be humiliated." Sally threatened.  
"Fine, I………" WuFei couldn't finish.  
"Okay, I'm putting a picture of you on the screen, so people all over can see what you did last night."  
"Noooooo! I…Love…..You! Anything, just don't show that!" WuFei exclaimed in embarrassment.  
"Oops, you're too late." Sally laughed evilly. Then she pressed a certain button, and a picture came up on the screen. Dorothy lifted up her laptop computer to see a picture of WuFei in Sally's underwear.  
"Oh, my God, WuFei, I didn't know you had it in ya!" Duo exclaimed as he burst out laughing. The others couldn't hold it in either, they all burst out laughing. (except Trowa, he just sat there.)  
"Omae o Korosu." WuFei told Sally .  
"Don't take my line, Justice Boy!" Heero grabbed WuFei's collar.  
"Let go!" WuFei struggled to get free.  
Then the next thing you know, all the boys are in some type of fight. Duo got mad at Quatre for insulting him when Dorothy asked the sufer-dude question. Then Heero was strangling WuFei for taking his line. But Trowa just sat there, ignoring all of it.  
"Dorothy, Dorothy, Dorothy, Dorothy…." The audience cheered.  
"Someone help me!" Dorothy sighed as she watched the boys fight. (Except Trowa, he just sat there.)  
"Time for the show to end, Dorothy. Get these boys to calm down for a close up of them one last time." Cathy came out from backstage and told her.  
"Okay. I'll do my best." Dorothy said as she saw the boys scuffling, well, the 4 boys.   
" 'Omae o Korosu' is my line!" Heero shouted.  
"Why don't you trust me, Quatre?" Duo shouted along with Heero.  
"Heero, anyone could use the statement 'Omae o Korosu'. Duo, you were not the surfer-dude. Okay?!" Dorothy yelled at the top of lungs.  
"Woah! I never heard Dorothy talk that loud!" Duo exclaimed in awe.  
"Neither have I!" Quatre also commented.  
"Okay, this is the end of my show, the Dorothy Show. Tomorrow, we'll interview Domon from Domon W, and see which girl he likes more, Rain or Allenby."  
"It's over already?" Duo asked as he looked at Dorothy.  
"Yep, and we need one last close-up of you boys." Dorothy sighed.  
"Oh, I'm Duo Maxwell saying good bye one last time." Duo ran up to the main camera.  
"Move, Duo! We can't see the other boys!" Cathy whispered.  
"Oh, uh, hehehe!" Duo said as he moved from the camera.  
Duo moved and ran back up with the boys. They all bowed in unison.  
"But one last thing to remember, Ms. Relena is always in the mood for flattery." Dorothy spoke and the audience clapped.  
  
Then this came up on the screen:  
  
The End 


End file.
